Thank You to Lauren’s Birthmom

I don’t know your name or what you look like. I imagine that you saw the tiny disformed face of your new child and it brought you to tears. You opened her pink lips and saw that the cleft was also inside the roof of her mouth. You may have feared this with every tiny flutter those months you anticipated seeing your precious baby. You knew the immense cost and care that would be needed, and understood that the only hope for a good life would be in the hands of someone else. Perhaps an American would lovingly care for this daughter that your country would punish you for birthing.

I imagine that held her tight as you carried her quietly in the night and gently laid her on the steps of the very busy Buddhist Temple knowing someone would soon open the doors and find her. You kissed her one last time and your heart broke as you slipped away from that tiny piece of yourself.

She was found “red and crying” by the monks. Still very much in need of a mother.

I thank you sweet woman for giving life to the little girl of my dreams. I kiss her everyday for you.

I tell her that you left her where you believed god would help her and God made sure that she found her forever home in our family, learning that she was created by Him, on purpose.

I will probably never see you in this lifetime but please know that you did the right thing, that she is safe and loved and that all her needs are met. She turned 8 years old today.

I can’t hug you, so I hug her.


Thank you.

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  1. Sue this is so beautiful. So many emotions in my heart at the moment…

  2. Just beautiful Sue….

  3. Being a Mom to two daughters and chosen by their birth mothers, I understand your depth of gratefulness. God saw. God knows. Great truths, Sue! God Bless you!

  4. Thank you for writing this. I gave my son up for adoption when I was a teenager and have never heard a word since. For some reason, it is difficult to imagine that they feel thankful to me. maybe because it was such a shame-filled time of my life.I believe that the birth-mama is thankful to you, and dreams of her daughter and her family often.
    I appreciate your words.

    • Your comment may have touched me more than any comment ever, and made me remember why I blog. I speak for adoptive moms everywhere and say thank you so much for you gift of life and love. Sue

    • U Know Who says:

      Dear Guest…
      Just be sure that the adoptive mom's say THANK YOU and are thankful for you!!! I know of a person that was adopted met the birth mom. All I can say is when the 2 moms met all they could do was thank one another for giving up the child and for raising the child. It was quite special witnessing the respect both women had for each other (I say in a past tense because the birth mom has since passed).
      And be sure that your child is probably just as thankful for giving gim up to allow him to have the life you wanted for him and could not give him at that time in your life!!!
      Not an adoptive mom myself… but I will also say THANK YOU!!!

  5. With out a doubt she offers thanks to God for you! Bless you!

  6. U Know Who says:

    We are thankful for Lauren in our life as well!!! She is a sweet girl and one who is considered a BFF in this house!!!
    Happy Birthday Lauren!!! We Love You!!!

  7. I feel the same way. I cry every time I think of what their mothers had/have to go through. I like to believe the mothers know that they girls were adopted and now have another family to love them.

  8. As an adoptive mom, I am so thankful for my beautiful daughter's birth mom. She did what I could not do by giving life to this child. I respect her for not choosing what might have seemed to be an easy way out of her situation. I am so thankful that she chose to carry this baby to term and do for her what she knew was best. I pray often that she knows how blessed we are to have the privilege of raising this beautiful girl!!

  9. Beautiful post!!

  10. Beautiful. So like His love for us. Thank you for sharing! xo